NEWSFLASH: Henry Winkler caught a nice trout
I can’t tell if me getting this truly cursed Christmas ornament in my “recommended for you” list on eBay makes me a good ally to the cause or if I’m the worst thing to happen to the LGBTQI community since Macklemore made his song about being gay in the 3rd grade. For what it’s worth, I did not purchase this.
Theme music for this newsletter
God I miss Prince’s physical presence in our earthly realm so much. I can’t stop thinking about the “People call me rude, I wish we all were nude,” lyric in this song and how GOOD it is. Also this era is arguably the best look Prince ever went for. I really like this punk rock dandy vibe and we must bring it back!
Pigeon Report
Please don’t ever ask me how I learned this, but apparently pigeons are a big threat when it comes to protecting the world’s greatest antiquities. Namely their poop ruins everything and in the future historians will be like “Oh how we wish we could see the buildings of old, but alas, they were melted by pigeon excrement. Oh Bother.”
Grade: F! Of course!
Are you okay? Checking in on my favorite d-listers
Good day to Henry Winkler and his rainbow trout.
Answer: Okay this is an acceptable way for straights to celebrate Pride I think.
The weirdest shit I saw on Craigslist recently
I can just see myself inviting this guy to install my cellar doors, plastic 1968 Adam West Batman toy in hand, he finishes the installation, pushes me into my cellar. Luckily for me, I did NOT barter my antique bayonet, so I get out speedy quick and kick his ass.
Shit you really ought to read
Some poetry. Unconscious racism. The real Zola. Stabler!!!!!!