I have brain scramble

You guys I’m thinking of starting a company that sells t-shirts, the kind that are heavily and aggressively marketed on Facebook. What do you think of my first one? You can take the girl out of a Gemini, but you can’t take the Gemini out of the girl!!!

Theme music for this newsletter            

I like this song muchly, but it was maddeningly stuck in my head during a bout of insomnia last night and OOF.

Pigeon Report     

Did you know a pigeon can tell the difference between a Monet and a Picasso? No, I did not, but WHO CARES. Call me when they can recognize trash from real food.

Grade: Ugh, I guess an A?

Are you okay? Checking in on my favorite d-listers      

She’s baaaaaaack. She’s a legend, she’s an icon, and she IS the moment. Yes, it’s a rare A-list appearance in Cracks and the only good thing to happen the last two years: Baby Yoda.Long-time Cracks readers will know that among the many things Werner Herzog and I have in common, is that we both love Baby Yoda. I don’t watch the Star Wars tv show because I am sorry but why would I pay for Disney+ when I’m sure the only movies they have are Air Bud and Air Bud 5: The Bud is Back.

However, I do legitimately read episode recaps just so I can know what Baby Yoda is up to. Does that make me a sociopath? Yes, and I’m lovin’ it.

So the big drama right now is that Baby Yoda wanted to eat some alien eggs? And that made people mad.

Answer: Baby Yoda is fine but I’m worried about y’all

The weirdest shit I saw on Craigslist recently      

Tis the season?

Hints from Hellouise         

I’m in another cooking slump, so in an attempt to be creative I tried to make crab rangoon at home and let me tell you I of course will eat fried cream cheese with fish no matter what, but it couldn’t possible compare to the perfect ones at Chinese-American restaurants, so I won’t even bother giving you the recipe.

Shit you really ought to read             

This read on the complicated morality of greyhound racing is SO interesting. The lord has blessed us with more cuteness. Can we stop leaving Kentucky hanging? This made me grimace so hard.